Hollywood Park

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Thank you to Celadon Books for providing me with a copy of Mikel Jollett’s memoir, Hollywood Park, in exchange for an honest review.

For those unaware, Mikel Jollett is the frontman and lyricist for the Los Angeles rock band, The Airborne Toxic Event. I’m a massive fan who has had the joy of seeing them live many times. The energy and storytelling of The Airborne Toxic Event affects me in a way that is unlike anything else.

Music is a funny thing. Like poetry, sometimes it is difficult to nail down why it speaks to you. With The Airborne Toxic Event, the songs and rhythm feel personal, and unique in capturing my experience growing up in Los Angeles.

Reading Hollywood Park and learning about Jollett’s life, made me understand my own life. Our situations are vastly different, but some of the childhood trauma rings true. It also helped me understand some of my early relationship choices and dysfunction. Like Jollett, I’ve reached a place in my life where I feel at peace with my past and hopeful for my future.

Jollett’s Hollywood Park was released as a memoir with an accompanying album of the same title. It is a grand undertaking that has been many years in the making. Both are fabulous and deeply affecting.

In his memoir, Jollett dives into his early childhood years spent at Synanon, a commune in California. Synanon was original started as place for recovering addicts, but over time, the leadership and motivations shifted. Jollett’s parents, his father a former heroin addict, and his mother, a Berkeley idealist, joined at a time when the commune was changing, including new rules that separated parents from their children. Jollett, and his older brother Tony, spent several years in an orphanage type arrangement in Synanon.

Their mother escaped with them in the middle of the night, but leaving Synanon was not easy. They feared retribution, and Jollett witnessed the severe beating of their mother’s boyfriend, who had also escaped the commune. Jollett’s mother suffered from mental illness and struggled with poverty. She had unstable relationships, including one man who was very abusive. Jollett’s father also left the commune, marrying Bonnie, another former Synanon member, who happened to work at the child center on the compound. Bonnie had bonded to Jollett when he was young and remained a second mother to him.

In Hollywood Park, Jollett comes to terms with the effects of his difficult childhood, which created problems in his adulthood. He carried the weight of his family, including the history of Jollett men going to prison, and falling into addiction. Even though he escape this family pattern, he was waiting for the other shoe to fall, as he found success with college, writing, and The Airborne Toxic Event. He struggled with relationships, always finding excuses to run away. After seeking therapy, he discovered that he had attachment disorder. Through therapy, he was able to prepare himself for engaging in a lasting relationship, which he found, and is now married with two children. It also prepared him to deal with his mother’s erratic behavior and the death of his father.

The title refers to a former Los Angeles landmark, a racetrack called Hollywood Park. Hollywood Park is a place where Jollett’s father used to escape for an afternoon of gambling and where he spent time with Jollett. The once glamorous race track fell into disrepair prior to it being torn down to make way for a football stadium. Jollett writes beautifully about these places that now only exist in our memory, both the physical places and the memories that we have of people we have lost. I lost my mom in 2008, and I have my own memories with her at both Hollywood Park and Santa Anita Race Track.

Jollett doesn’t write much about The Airborne Toxic Event, but he does give insight to the origins of two of their early hits: “Wishing Well” and “Sometime Before Midnight.” This memoir isn’t really about the band, but more about the origins of the man who felt compelled to put his words into songs.

I was fortunate to attend a virtual book event for Hollywood Park that was hosted by Tattered Cover, a Denver based bookshop. The event was originally supposed to be live, but due to Covid-19, virtual was the next best option. It was actually great. Jollett joined us from his home and played several songs. He was gracious with answering questions and sharing intimate details of his life. A week after the event, I received a hardback copy with an autographed bookplate.

Hollywood Park is a stunning memoir. It’s heartbreaking and uplifting. It is a must-read for fans of Jollett, but even if you’ve never heard of The Airborne Toxic Event, I highly recommend Hollywood Park. It is one of the most affecting and engaging memoirs that I have ever read.

 

 

 

Big Summer

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Thank you to Atria Books for providing me with a copy of Jennifer Weiner’s latest novel, Big Summer, in exchange for an honest review.

Drue Cavanaugh appears to have it all. She’s rich, beautiful, and successful. However, looks can be deceiving, and happiness is something that has always eluded Drue. Drue is magnetic and charming, which draws people to her, but she also has a ruthless, mean streak, which destroys her friendships.

Drue’s childhood friend, Daphne Berg, was a target of Drue’s cruelty, and after a particularly painful incident, they haven’t spoken in six years. Daphne is surprised when Drue contacts her, begging Daphne to be her maid of honor for her upcoming lavish Cape Cod wedding. Drue seems sincere in her desire to fix their friendship, but there is another piece of the puzzle. Daphne is a rising social media star and Drue pitches that Daphne can use the wedding to promote herself. Many aspects of the wedding are being promoted on social media and companies have donated products for the bride and groom to showcase.

Daphne agrees, and she is swept back into Drue’s glamorous world. On the night of the rehearsal dinner, Daphne meets a handsome man and has a steamy one-night stand. The next morning, the man is gone, and Drue is found dead in a nearby hot tub. Daphne is a suspect, and she works to solve the mystery of both Drue’s murder and the identity of her mystery man.

I’ve read many of Weiner’s previous novels, and I’m a fan. I was excited to read Big Summer, but I must confess that this was a miss for me. The first third of the story is strong; setting up the history and dynamic between Drue and Daphne. Daphne is a charming character, especially as we meet her after she has made a big transformation in her life. She is happy and on the path to success when Drue’s reappearance threatens her. Drue’s sway over people is captivating. I found my interest crumbling after Drue died and the story shifts to a mystery.

I didn’t anticipate the reveal of the murderer, yet it wasn’t a satisfying twist. Weiner sets Drue up as someone who has wronged many people and therefore, her murderer could be anyone. Daphne, and her roommate Darshi, set-off to solve the various mysteries. The mystery aspect of the novel has a lot of convenient situations and tenuous links. I didn’t find it plausible and my interest waned. Mysteries are a departure for Weiner, and I applaud her for trying something new, but it didn’t gel.

A lovely aspect of the story was the relationship between Daphne and her parents, especially her father. Daphne and her father have a Sunday tradition of trying different restaurants and cuisines. In a flashback scene, Drue joins them one Sunday. Drue’s parents have held her at a distance, and being included on this Sunday outing was an emotional experience for Drue. Daphne is made aware that the love from her parents and their support is something that money can’t buy.

Big Summer has beautiful themes of the ability to change and not being defined by your past. Daphne has insecurities due to her weight, but when she allows herself to let go of her worries, she finds acceptance, including a new boyfriend, Nick. Speaking of Nick, their romance is passionate and sexy. I may have been blushing!

Big Summer reminds us that not everything on social media is how it appears, both what is shared and what is kept private. People have the ability to change, even if we are not noticing their changes. I’m a fan of Weiner and will certainly read her future novels, but Big Summer was enough of a miss for me, that I can’t recommend it. The strengths in Big Summer are the characters and themes, but the overarching plot is messy.